Hey Matt You Slacker! Gotcha!

Leave an innocent comment on my blog and next thing you know… You are the story. So here is to you, Matt, just because… Ever since I added you to my blogroll, you haven’t produced a single post. You let me down. I don’t like to be let down.

Hotel Halloween
Hotel Halloween

The Shining
The Shining
Family portrait with Rosemary\'s baby
Family portrait with Rosemary’s baby

HanniMatt Lecter doll

Hannimatt Lecter Doll

Matt the Dragon Slayer, I think
Matt the Dragon Slayer, I think

Now Matt, I understand you would like to dedicate your time and grey matter to higher intellect endeavors, but come on, nothing could ever be as much fun as blogging! Whom will you taunt with your usual obnoxiousness?

One last one… For the road.

Now THESE look like tracksuits!
Now THESE look like tracksuits!

Sorry Allison! Before enrolling your help, I should have stipulated you were fair game too.

16 responses to “Hey Matt You Slacker! Gotcha!

  1. 1. Very well done!
    2. My wife continues to prove that she is evil.
    3. If I had known I looked that good in a track suit, I would have donned one years ago.
    4. Who needs enemies when you have blogging friends?
    5. That gray/grey Hannibal shirt thingy is pinching me a bit in certain, crucial places. Could it be loosened ever so slightly, please?
    6. You, Nathalie, are one cool chick.
    Sincerely,
    The best blogger with one swollen leg in the world (but not necessarily the most frequent)

  2. 1. Thank you Matt! I would have liked to obtain high-res images but I played with the deck I was dealt.
    2. You betcha! I like her evilness. Very cool Madame Licensetoblog. You are a very lucky man indeed.
    3. Totally! Although I’m sure you’d look good in a parachute outfit too.
    4. Once again, I concur… although you brought it on yourself.
    5. Incarceration is not for sissies. We have means to make you talk. The squeezing is purposeful. It stays.
    6. Well, thank you sir. I thought someone could use a good laugh!
    I hope stuff gets better.

  3. This is so utterly fantastic!

  4. These pictures are terrific. Hotel Halloween is my favorite. He just looks so natural in that scene.

    I won’t even hold it against you that I am depicted wearing a tracksuit. For the record, I have never worn a tracksuit. Well, not a red one anyway.

    (I love that you have me adorned in painted toenails.)

  5. WHEW! Good thing I just posted. You’ve already labeled me a slacker and I was duly frightened by your menacing tone, proficiency with Photoshop, and that evil, evil, brilliant mind.

    This is just too greatly funny and you should be stopped!!!!

    You are making the rest of the blogging population feel diminished and vanilla in a world of mocha walnut halvah mint cookie dough chip!!!

    Who would have imagined that an innocent comment about a pink track suit would have garnered more attention than J Lo when she first wore one.

  6. Thanks Pamajama! It was a lot of fun playing with Matt unbeknownst to him…

    Allison, thanks again for providing the photographs. It was an honor and a privilege to morph Matt into spooky twin girls. Reading his new post yesterday, I think you must have your hands full with him. Wow!
    About the toenails, let it be known that I lifted the photograph of what looked like 6 year olds modeling tracksuits. The baby girl had painted nails. The horror, the horror!

    Yeah… Bonnie. you are not exactly off the hook yet, my friend. For the record, it was not an innocent comment about a pink track suit – it was a vicious distortion of reality destined to insult my sense of fashion. He got his comeuppance.
    Now that you mention it, I should have given him J Lo’s booty. Next time.

  7. “Hold your friends close and your unproducing blog friends closer” planetross.

    Someone else may have said the same thing, but with different words.

    Nice wake-up call 🙂

  8. Well, Ross, now you know (very well) what might be in store for you if you ever disappointed me. Don’t disappoint me. Doctored images of you would have to be outrageous and I don’t think my readership is ready for such debauchery.

  9. Heaven’s to Betsy, that made me laugh big style-ee. Can’t wait to see what mad inspiration you have for us hidden up that very long sleeve of yours! PLEASE keep it up.

  10. Hola. This is Bonnie Luria’s son Noel. Very hip Blog you have.

    -Noel

  11. ….all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy

  12. Mademoiselle, it is a very small delicate sleeve actually. Heaven’s to Betsy? Is this a little bit like Mork calling Orson?

    Noel! The Good son hottie. I’ll be jiggered! So where’s the blog? Too busy making Jack a happy lively boy to share a few thoughts with the world? If you have an ounce of your mother’s artistry in you, it would be sad not to partake.
    Please, feel free to come back anytime and reiterate the hipness of my blog. Heaven’s to Betsy!

  13. I wish that i could cut and paste like you … I’ve just started learning this skill … and I’m a little terrible at it.

  14. I paint with language-based pigments, they dont stain and they are very cost effective. FYI, I am chromatically challenged, thus I just enjoy the Chegals and Seurats at MOMA…..glad others find my mothers abilities wonderful too.

  15. Chromatically challenged, Noel? As in daltonian or as in unable to match colors? My dad was daltonian. We went to L.A. for a vacation when I was a little girl. After we got settled at the hotel, he left to rent a car. He came back with a bright pink convertible. My mother was horrified. He had to take the car back. I so wanted to keep it.
    Your mom rocks. I truly hope to meet her in person some day…

  16. To Whom it may conecern,
    I am a pupil from St Wilfrids Rc college and i am hoping to borrow a picture from you this will only be for me and will not be seen by public

    your reply would be much appreciated

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