Tag Archives: Hooters

Kidney Transplant Slacker Gets Wings

In 2003, Matt received the gift of a spanking new kidney from his sister. In a rather upsetting turn of event, he began developing health issues about six months ago. Instead of opting to lead a productive life just like everybody else, Matt stopped working and started swelling. Inexplicably.

During his leave of absence, he got laid off… It was his pharmacist who indirectly informed him of his dismissal. The company had forgotten to tell him. Oops. And so he continued to leisurely swell…

Last week, Matt flew to St. Louis for a test to determine the cause of the problem, got a nice catheter into the artery right by the neck, enjoyed the company of a lovely white trash mythomaniac roomate, then went home without any answers.

He is my favorite kidney recipient EVER even though he is a total slacker who posts only once every blue moon and is at constant risk of being yanked out of my blogroll for failure to get with the program.

Matt enjoys going to Hooters. He alleges it’s all about their Hot Wings. I believe this is tantamount to saying you buy Playboy for the articles but who would I be to contradict a swollen kidney recipient?

Instead I decided to be pro-active in my support and drove to the local Hooters. I explained the need for Hot Wings photographs, and the girls were only too happy to help out. So Matt, here is to you:

Sheree

Christy

Alisha

Kandice

Lauren

Christiana

Stefanie

Chelsea

Brittany and Heather

Siarah

Voila mon petit Matt. I’ve done my share to help the nephrology cause. I hope these mere wings inspired you and helped dickrease your swelling 😉 Please let me know if there is anything else I can do.

note to my clients: This random act of kindness was all my idea but the content of this post was entirely devised by my evil alter ego nataliewithnoh.

double note: To all of you who access my blog by searching the terms “nathalie boobs”, I have updated the tags for variation; you may now submit “nathalie gazongas” for your pleasure.

triple note to planetross: I’ve decided my emulation of you should start by the tail end of things.